blah.

I've been singing songs in the night-time

I was banging my head
And I could not care
What they think
I said don't open the door

Even if you hear me screaming

mannn. tryouts done.
look at the photo above to see how i was during it.
the physics one was hell on earth.
:/
anyway..
nothing much has been happening.
been really boring, to tell you the truth.
wanting to graduate so bad
but not wanting to say goodbye.
sigh.
it's kind of weird.

anyway, does anyone know if we're gonna have our prom or not?
cause it will really suck if we don't.
jah. i seriously do not really know what i want to write,
other than the fact that i'm pretty bored.
haven't been out of the house much lately.
only been to courses and courses, and more courses.
jah, im gonna watch my oprah now.

p.s. rest in peace the NTU kid who killed the professor.
man, smart people are just so complicated :/

p.p.s. since everyone been talking about this so much,
i probably wont get accepted at ntu peeps
so do not worry,
i will not kill myself.
the only reason i want to go to singapore is just for the no-relatives-therefore-no-curfew reason.
ciao.

bittersweet,

i have sleepy eyes.

!!!!!
last day of lab exam!
we don't have to wear stupid lab coats anymore
and i am happy yet sad that it's over.
sad that the end is near.
really really near.
and i am still in love with the kids i call friends.
jah..
but anyway.
been having some problems lately..
i don't know.
when is love not worth the fight anymore?
some people need to know the answer to that.
some people need to learn that maybe at times,
when the entire world is against them,
maybe they just need to give up.
just let go.
let go.
l e t g o.
and hopefully one day meet again.
and the circumstances were different.
don't worry, i'm not falling for anyone.
i am still standing. haha.

i don't know.
i have mixed feeling about this certain problem.
i am amazed to see perseverance in people when pursuing love.
at the same time, i feel that people are just fooling themselves.
trying to be the romeo and juliet of the century
is like trying to find a nano-needle in a hay stack.
i turns out, you cant save people from drowning if they're happy not breathing and hyperventilating in the water.
:/
i am sorry dear,
i've tried to save you,
to pull you out of the hell hole you're creating.
but it's just un-do-able.
i have to be happy watching you drown.
but just in case, i have a life jacket here for you.
just for you only.

DONE.

oh my god.
i am in the airport in jakarta.
IT SUCKS HERE. seriously.
waiting for my 9 pm flight back to surabaya.
here's to it not getting delayed.
FINISHED NTU TEST TODAY!!
guess who was number 170?
AGATHAAAAAAA WAS!
oh my god.
the math test was unbearable.
the calculator didn't help much.
skipped 2 questions cause the time ran out.
finished 15 out of 17.
i don't know.
pray for me?

anyway...
recapping what happened this week.
stayed at home on monday.
tuesday, went to romi's house for aerobics.
amiek got mad at hansel.
awkward silent, much?
anyway, that was finished quickly.
wednesday went to romi's again.
for the play, which ended at 7 ish i guess.
thursday at romi's again! OhMYGod.
romi we are sorry for ruining your house.
for stinking up your expensive leather sofas.
and most importantly stinking up your carpets. hehe :)
thursday at romi's again after a day of laboratories and exams and homeworks.
went back to school to set up all the decor for the play for the next day.
stayed at school until 11 pm.
which is a perfect 2 hours over my bedtime. seriously.
the play was okay ish.
wore my forever21 black top with a black skirt i own from ages ago
that was apparently too short as i was running around the stage carrying a microphone.
i felt like FAT britney.
jah.

anyway.
NTU TEST DONE
oh my Jesus, i cant believe it is
and i am so relieved
and i am so ready to get back at partying with friends and eating out again.
and shopping again.
*sigh*

oh yeah.. little note
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAREST FRIEND PRISCILLA!!!!!
i hope you have the best damn birthday ever
even though i am not around :(
thankyou for being an amazing friend throughout all these years
and not complaining with my cursing.
hoping you have a better year!
hehe :)

birthday wishes.

amiek's bday is today!
happy birthday to her!!! :)
she's 18.
omygod.
may God bless her in everything she does..
anyway

me and the kids bought her a cake from harvest


it was so goodddd :)
and we asked ricardo who was nearby at the time to take photos of us
and in return, we gave him a humongous piece of cake.
but it turns out, garry walked by.
so we asked him instead to take pictures, and ricardo joined on the pic. haha.

top: hansel - ivan - ricardo - adryan - hendry
bottom: cha2 - romi - ME! - amiek the bday gal - kristina - elien

so anyway,
had math exam today
and my stomach wasnt cooperating
so i ended up being sick and wanting to throw up the whole test
gah.

had lab hours to do today.
so thankful for elien, hendry, and lydia who were so patient with my bitching.
i am sorry :(
i am just not in the mood for voltmeters and amperemeters.

so..
valentine's in 2 days.
haven't bought anything for the cupcakes.
*sigh*

sleep-deprived.

got sick today.
had to go home from school earlier.
had a really bad stomach ache.
really really bad.
i could feel the pain on my back and everywhere, so i went home.
and then ate soup for the whole day.
and drink hot tea.

anyway..
don't have much to say today, other than the fact i'm terribly tired.
tired.
sleeping isnt really sleeping when your brain is still thinking.

jah.
on a lighter note,
been thinking of this chinese proverb thing lately.
xiao xin.
which my friend said means "be careful"
but i read somewhere, that it's this advice men used to give their sons.
they'd tell their sons to marry girls they don't really love.
and even if they do love her, they aren't supposed to be "giving" his heart to her.
cause if she dies, their sons will not have anything left.
i guess it's just interesting.
:/

tired.

woah.
today has been bizarrely weird, to say the least.
had english test in the morning, but i forgot about it
and i didn't study at all
jah, but i did okay, i think.
anyway.
had aerobics practice again today.
which was really kind of useless.
cause i didn't even break a sweat.
and so, i spent the whole entire day studying math for the ntu test thingy.
shit shit shit.
will be leaving for jakarta in 2 weeks man.
pray pray pray for me.

am currently wishing that priscilla will make it onto nus.
scored 107 in chem test. haha.
i am such a geek.

so anyway anyway,
took a lot of pictures at romi's house today.
will go steal some from cha-cha's blog.
:)